Wednesday, September 14, 2011

The Girlfriends

They met for lunch today, this group of friends who hadn't seen each other all summer.   And as girlfriends often do, they TALKED.  About everything from the best way to avoid mold in the rubber strip of their front-loading washing how to best communicate with their husbands. 

These ladies are not perfect - not by any means.  They've all admitted their weaknesses and faults to each other, because over the years, they've discovered that there is strength in sharing their struggles. 
And today, over lunch, they talked and laughed, and caught up on each other's lives.  
Somehow, the conversation shifted to their frustration about how their husbands dont listen to them...or if they listen, they dont remember what was said.  They all seemed to share that frustration, and strangely, that fact seemed to encourage them.  Because maybe it wasn't that they were unimportant or boring...maybe it was just a "man thing".  
And please dont misunderstand - these ladies didn't sit to have a man-bashing session!  No - these ladies were just speaking from their hearts.  They were joking and laughing with amazement at how all their husbands seemed to do all the same things! 

As she listened to her friends, one of the ladies secretly wished that her friends' husbands could be hearing the conversation.   If they could only hear their beautiful wives, talking in an environment where they knew that each word was being heard and taken to heart by the hearer - Instead of how they usually heard their wives...speaking in moments of frustration or anger.   Wouldn't they agree, that their wives were worth listening to?
One of the ladies said, "I’m home alone most of the time.  So when he’s home and I want to talk to him, he puts out his hand and says 'sssshhhh'...because he's watching TV."
"And it’s kinda hurtful, isn’t it?", said another.  "My husband comes home, sits down and watches sports.  I take the kids up for a bath, and when I come back down, he’s gone to bed."
Another said, "You know,  I asked my husband why he didn’t listen to me.  And his answer was, ‘because I know you'll tell me again.' "
“I know all my husband's coworkers' names", said another lady.  "..And I even know what each of their jobs' are. Why?  Because I listen to him and remember what he has to say because its important to him. But he cant remember what I just said to him.  What if he talked about work all the time, but I didn't remember anything he said?  I think he'd feel bad"
They were speaking somewhat lightheartedly, of course...but still, there was an ever-so-slight sadness in their voices.  
But these ladies know something. They know that the most important thing isn't to be heard...the most important thing is to be right with their Creator.
The lady who'd been secretly wishing that the husbands could hear the conversation said,  "The other day in a silly argument about nothing important, my husband told me that he'd change when I changed.  I didn’t say anything at the time, but I knew that I didn’t have the same privilege.  I know that I cant wait for him to change before I do...I have to change because I know God wants me to. "
They all agreed that it was easier said than done, but that it was the truth.
You see, after venting and sharing their struggles, this group of imperfect ladies know the conclusion to the whole matter.  That it doesn't matter.  That they need to do what is right in the eyes of God, no matter what other people do. 
Still, they all thought it might be nice if they could feel "important" or "interesting" once in a while.  

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